sarah, zh..thank you both so much. there's much truth to your words...

the time is NOW. there's nothing else stopping it but what zh said...me/us. i need to give t and i both permission i think, based on past discussion. t is just patiently waiting, i think.

zh, you're not off base at all. i do feel a sense of urgency. however, that's not the leading factor. there is no longer anything in the way of "going there". my world is safe, the ppl in it are safe, it's past time.

i've made a promise to self. we'll see what happens.

thank you both.

kd