Dear fiery,

Oh yes you CAN get over this. It's been done, many times. Keep talking to people on the depression forum. They know. They've been there. And they have come back from the edge of the abyss. I know it looks impossible from where you stand today. I do know. I have been there myself. But you can come back, both for yourself and for your children. You can adjust your mind with the help of a T and meds, to the point where you won't think about death all the time and you will enjoy life, your life and your children's lives.

Regarding your preoccupation with death and your thinking that it might happen at any moment. A thousand years of statistics, stretching all the way back to the middle ages, shows that the probability of someone like you dying, at your age, is very, very low. Your mind is hurt and it twists things out of proportion, thinking you may die when science says that's not true. The chances of your dying now are very, very low. And that's not just my opinion. Ask any of your doctors. They will agree with me. The average woman in the United States lives into her eighties. And chances are that you are either average or ABOVE average.

Think about your poor children. What could they do if you destroyed yourself? They would miss you so terribly all their lives. Don't do that to them. Be as good a mother as you can, but don't rip yourself away from them. And, most certainly, DO NOT HURT THEM EITHER. They deserve a chance to grow up and be happy. And they'll do that if you stay here with them.

I wish there was more that I could say. I wish there was more I could show you. But please understand, your mind is playing tricks on you and you have to work with your T to have your mind stop that nonsense.

I wish you and your children all my fondest regards. Take care.