this feels sort of passive-aggressive to me, but I know my T has group tonight, so I'm thinking about calling her while she's in group so I can leave a message without worrying about her actually picking up. I just would like to tell her how that triggered me and why, that I'm afraid she's backing out of her commitment to me that she would walk through this, all the way, with me.

I still don't even know. I feel like I should just put this away and talk about it next week, but it is bothering me so much and next week is, like, a whole week away. UGH.