I always said when I was younger that I would never have children because I couldn't stand the screaming and crying. But now that I'm getting older, I am mature enough to see that it's so much more than that. But I don't know if I want to bring a child into this corrupted world of ours. That's the only thing holding me back. And what if it has some rare illness or something like that and there are no doctors that know how to treat it? How could I handle losing a child, a part of myself? I'm sorry if this triggers, I just want to be sure that I want a child before I agree to conceive one. One of my only wishes now is to have a beautiful, healthy baby girl that would love me no matter how imperfect I am. A man may cheat on me or leave me, but my baby will always be by her mama's side