I think I will (attempt to) talk about this w/my T. We've talked about it on the phone a few times, but never in session. I want to ask her exactly what I posted above, what is missing in me that I cannot tell myself I'm okay? And what are we going to do to fix that?

Because it is horrible always needing that outside confirmation. It is demoralizing and inevitably the other people in my life, being people, fail me. And when that happens I feel like I've been cut adrift in space with nothing to hold on to and just floating away, forever.

thank you for understanding, PC friends