I've grown up having a mother there for me, but I think we never really got close.
My later teenage years I had a mother figure I looked up to and could discuss anything with. She was instrumental in my formative years.
I wanted to spend every waking hour around her.
2 years ago I again met an older woman, this time at work - I was 23 and she was 39. Something just attracted me to her, even though I'd been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years. We ended up getting together; the first time either of us had really gotten involved in same-sex relationship. She had been divorced from her husband , and I'd never been with a woman.

Today I am back with my boyfriend, and she is dating some other guy (I think, as we are no longer in contact) I guess that relationship was a mixture of a mother-figure setup, and a really chemical and emotional click.

It's behind me though. At the same time, I still feel terribly lonely, even though I am in a relationship with my boyfriend and live with him. It's almost like I'm yet again hunting for a mother-figure. I definitely do not expect a physical or romantic relationship, but there is just such an empty yearning inside me