My new girlT caught my attention with the observation that when I get close to change, I shut down.
I told her I thought this was normal! She agreed.
I knew something wasn't right about this for me, but all I could come up with was "I'm not in therapy to fix something specific, like a fear of flying"

BUT
last night it occurs to me that I've not necessarily had change as my goal in therapy - maybe in a theoretical way (I'd like to know that my parents love me, what has to change to make that happen?).
With originalT, so much of our work helped me to understand myself and others. Then, if I wished, I could change how I interacted with my world to get a different result. It was gentle. It was powerful for me.

Are you working on a concrete change OR personal understanding of your inner world, mind, emotions? Is it either/Or?