Hi Kiya, long time no see!
I remember when I used to spend a day or two figuring out what to do about a sticky situation and occasionally putting together letters like that. Sometimes I sent them, sometimes I just journaled them for my own satisfaction. Whatever effect the finished letter might have had, I'm pretty sure it was less important in the long run than the process of writing it was for me. I admire your commitment, creativity and persistence.
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Originally Posted by Kiya
We, the group members, do not have all the skills. That is why we are stuck. That is why we are in *intensive* group therapy for "Those Who Are Stuck". Why then would we be expected to marshall ourselves?
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For practice?
Pretty much the same way that putting together that letter seems to have been great practice for you!
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T also tells me "A good group leader, which GT is, knows that they are not there to control the group." But how can we all know this if we are not told? I've been told - and I've repeated it in group, but to no avail.
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No doubt the group T has had a lot of experience in groups and has acquired skills that the members haven't yet. Still, my hunch is that there's only so much she can do to steer the group in a particular direction. If she were to exercise more control than she has been, her interventions might spare the group some unpleasantness but might also serve to keep some members suppressed who were already looking for an excuse to hang back. Perhaps the best argument for her staying out of the way a bit, is that it gives members like you an incentive to step in and start developing your own skills.
I suspect that if that group had functioned entirely normally and focused 100% on therapy, you'd have ended up getting quite a bit less out of it than you did this way.