I have bipolar II and although I am on no meds right now (not by choice, I just came out of the hospital with 2 saddle pulmonary embolisms from side effects to meds) I understand that feeling also. It's almost as if the body and the mind are not insync.

When I was rapid cycling, the depression was just numbing, mentally and physically. I seem to be stable now but it landed in the depressed with a little bit of functioning mode. So I guess it is functionally depressed? But I feel so numb and that is what really bothers me it is almost as if I am drugged up.

And my normal mood used to be hyperthymic. So I almost feel like I have lost "me". Can't find me, don't feel the same about things including friends and family either. It is hard, it feels like I am living a different life since my onset of bipolar 4 yrs ago.

Anyone else feel this way?