Thanks Perna, this is so true. I am ready, able and willing to create my own good kharma, healthy friends, etc. I am a strong, independent, separate entity from my past relationship. And the less I focus on the past, the more I build for the future. No more whining, I promise. Unless i am on the verge of contacting him again, of course! then i will whine with abandon. and you can tell me to stop feeding the bears! thanks.