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Aug 24, 2010, 10:44 PM
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Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: So Cal
Posts: 3,342
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I have DID....diagnosed last year, but been in therapy for six years. 
Living in peace.....umm.....yeah....it happens. Usually when the external stressors, such as work, school, bills, etc., are going well and everything is going smoothly, my internal system is able to find a nice wave length to float upon.
Right now....things are not nice. My system is in turmoil and several of my parts feel like they don't want to do this "life" thing anymore so it's a bit challenging.
Being that my diagnosis is so new....and I have this way of sabotaging myself, it seems like that every time things start to mellow, somehow I find a way to create waves and land myself in a bit of trouble, thus preventing myself from being able to get to the trauma stuff. The good thing is, only recently have I been able to see this and identify it as mal-adaptive. Now that I can actually see it and identify it, it will hopefully become easier to stop myself from sabotaging me.
So, I guess my point is that peace is in the eye of the beholder. There is peace when things are good outside....and when they're bad outside, there's turmoil....but we've been in turmoil for so long it seems normal and believe it or not there is an odd peace found in the abnormal normalcy of chaos. Like an old friend that you know is no good for you, but who always finds a way to make you laugh and feel better about yourself.
I apologize if this didn't make much sense. 
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