Okay honey. Take some deep breaths, ok?

The very most important thing right now, is that YOU ARE OK after all of that happened. ARE you ok? How do you feel about all of this? I get the sense you feel a little shaken up, unsure, and perhaps a bit guilty for going further than you wanted to with the boys?

It is really really important for you to talk to SOMEONE about this. It doesn't have to be your mother if you are not ready and you feel she would kick you out of the house. Most areas and countries have a childs phone in line where you can talk anonymously, or you can continue here.

I myself am almost thirty now, but you know, a long time ago when I was your age, I did alot of those type of things so I know how you feel right now. I want to share that with you because I don't want your life to go the way mine did.

It is admirable that you are worried about your friends right now as that shows you are a sensitive and caring person! However, you need to focus on YOU for the moment and how you will make your choices from here on out.

You say you are worried that you may have had sex without remembering you did - is this right? If it is, do you have a planned parenthood in your area? You can phone them for advice and possibly go in to talk to a nurse as well if you think thats something you need. You can even be checked for STD's for free at most of the clinic, but I am not sure if they would have to tell your mom. Here if you are over 12 they do not have to tell anyone, i think.

A good practice to follow is ALWAYS mix YOUR OWN drinks at parties. Never let anyone give you a drink no matter how well you know them! The reason is if you mix it, you know what is in it, and if you decide to drink, you will be able to control how much and what. Even if your best friend mixes your drink, perhaps someone else has spiked it already and she doesn't know. ANd carry your drink with you everywhere even the washroom! I often only drink from bottles at parties or bars, because its harder to slip something into a bottle than a glass.

Can you tell me what country of the world you live in? Then I can find you a phone in line to call where you will be anonymous.

Okay, some questions. What is it you want to do about choices from here? Do you feel like you want to continue to have sex? Do you feel like you may want to drink again? Or right now you feel like you would rather not get into those things until you are older? You have alot of power here for the future - you can make those choices and I am not telling you either is wrong. But you do need to decide how to do that safely and make some plans if you decide you are going to. It is really important to use protection.

I'll keep an eye on this thread, and will reply when you write back and let me know a bit more. Don't panic ok? You are safe and ok now and the focus should be on keeping safe in the future - a mistake is just that, a mistake and although its not good that it happened, it doesn't mean the end of your life.