life is better than suicide. yes maybe it is time to start taking anti d's again. you must look after yourself first. i would not be worrying about relationships at this point in time if i were you. i stopped taking my anti d's this time last yr. after 6 months - and a terrible situation where i was being used by a supposed friend, i became really ill again. not that i wanted to die - i just didn't want to live. slowly i have clawed my way back and now realise i prolly need to be on the anti d's forever. i have accepted that because i never want to go to that place again. i am just able to cope better when i am on meds. i am a very sensitive and caring person, unfortunately the other person was a user. anyway, please stick around, it is worth it.