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Old Aug 26, 2010, 07:11 PM
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Belle1979 Belle1979 is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Nov 2009
Location: Perth Australia
Posts: 1,193
Quote:
Originally Posted by kirawolf View Post
Hello! Thank you all for responding, i really appreciate it <3. I have more to this though:

I have had some contact with him, from my side. I met him at a busstop once, on accident, and i stepped up to him. The conversation went as followed:
Kira: "Hey!"
Ex: *raises hand sadly*
Kira: "How are you?"
Ex: "hmm.. it's okay" *sad look*
Kira: "Yeah same here, kind of okay" *tries smile and grabs his hand* "You know i very much love you right? You know that".
Ex: *stays silent and gets tears in his eyes*
Kira: *puts hand on his cheek* "Come by tomorrow or something okay? I hope you will".
Ex: "Maybe, i'll see."

He didn't come, but okay. The next while he had been quiet, and i decided to text him something. Asking him if we could have a talk, from adult to adult. The night after he sent me this:

"I've asked you before, and it hurts to ask again but.. Could you let me go my own path, for just a while? I mean, i have a lot on my mind and i have a lot to process, not just our things, also other not so fun stuff.. I'm sorry you need to tell me something so badly but i really can't do this.. Everything around me is falling apart and i just can't handle it right now so please.. Let me be with myself for a moment.."

This mail confuses me. All the 'for now, for a moment, right now" etc. It sounds like he's emotionally confused, needs time for himself, but isn't quite ready to just let go of me. Or well, that's how i know him. I mailed him back that i would be there for him, he could call or whatever if he wanted to. And i hoped he would, just as me, want a break and not a break-up. Because he never responds to that question.

I am going away this weekend, asked him to text me if he liked, because i'm very worried. I am trying to be there for him all the way. What do you guys think about this email and stuff? It sounds like there is some major confusion going on in him, and he just needs to figure it out. And then he'll want to come back..

I know that you are really hoping that he will come back to you .
I had a similar situation.. my ex looked so unhappy when I did see him.. I'd try to be 'happy' around him and keep the conversations light and happy...
Yes my ex was SAD.. but it was more guilt that he was hurting me than anything else.. I had given him the world, the guilt that he felt was overwhelming for him. He didn't love me anymore - not in the way that I wanted but I didn't see that. I saw what I wanted to see - that he was confused, upset and that he didn't really want to not be with me.

Rather than thinking of it as giving him space - give yourself some space to find the REAL you.. settle into your new single life. I know that it is hard, the pain is unbearable but I promise you that you will be a stronger person in the long run for this experience
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Thanks for this!
Rhiannonsmoon