Hello Curley,

I personally think obsessing is over focusing and so you need something to re-focus and not get stuck on zoom.

I woke up this morning in a worse state of anxiety than I've been in for a while (probably because I found out Megan took us out yesterday and that scared the crap out of me) and as usual flew out of bed because if I had stayed there I would have been obsessing about even more and I would have had a panic attack before I got up.

Getting up makes me do my ablutions and makes me focus on that rather than what is in my head that I can't get out. The thoughts remind of those little mechanical toys that only go as far as the wall and just keep bumping into it constantly, unable to turn around or get onto a different track. I am as afraid of that as I am a panic attack.

I am really anxious this morning but I've already decided I am not taking a xanax because I know they are addictive and if I simply give in every time I feel anxious and swallow a pill I'm not doing anything active enough to re-focus my mind on something else which can work as well as a xanax (unless it's 2am in the morning and I'm staring off into the darkness with bloodshot eyes).

Read a chapter of a book or a page, create a new life for yourself, on the high seas or trekking in the outback, climbing a mountain; a sailor on the ocean, a collector of fine Egyptian antiquities. Bake a cake or cookies, make some cornbread or baked vegetables. There are other things you can do; though I do know that sometimes the anxiety is too strong to over come and in those instances I take a shower or spring clean a part of the house...

I hope you can find something to occupy you when you feel this way. I know how you feel and I send you my empathy,

Rhiannon