I know how you feel, I wasted 7 years of my life doing this same routine, get up, go to work, avoid as many people as possible, come home, watch TV and stew about why I can't have a life. Unfortunately, it took till I was homeless to take any action to try to remedy my situation. I sense anger, I know it's anger directed toward yourself, I know how inadequate and insignificant you feel, I feel the same, I know your pain. Don't give in to it, keep fighting, keep posting on PC, come visit me anytime you want to vent or unload. I wish you wellness and serenity.