What do you do when you have never had emotions and they are hitting you at once and it seems you have no where to turn? You have no idea how to cope with them and they do not seem to make any sense? Feels as though you are going to be in trouble if you dare feel them yet you cannot turn them off for they are like a faucet that seems broken.

Right now emotions are raging and I cannot find an off button. Maybe there should not be an off button but when you never had then there is no instruction book for them either. It hurts and is scary to feel so much and not know how to feel them or what to do with them now that they are here. It feels as though I will sink in the flood of the tears and the fear shakes as though a storm is here. Although the fear feels so familiar and something I have always known when it mixes with everything else it feels out of control.

Tears fall and sometimes you wonder where they come from or if they will ever stop. And it feels so wrong or like you will be punished and you try to hide it but it screams almost as loud as the voice wanting them to stop. But something inside you tells you they are needed to heal but another part is terrified of what it means. It sometimes feels as though they will never end. Is it normal to feel this and is it okay to allow them to come? Why does it hurt so much and why is it so uncontrollable?

Everywhere we look seems there is a flow of emotions of some kind, and all we know is it is scary and yet something we cannot stop and feels as though it is needed. Are we alone? Will we be okay?

dps