I so appreciate your being here.
You voice what's inside me very well(I've been too chicken to say such here)... it's almost eerie......

I don't post in this forum much... I struggle to realize any of this.
"silly"-- yea, that's how I feel about it.
I don't want this anymore than I want cancer....
I hate this. It's hard to talk about and I struggle doing so.

not knowing where such and such money came from,
people talking about some trip that I have NO clue about and yet am told I went also, and sometimes not understanding adult issues
makes me recall those from my childhood saying-- "you're so stupid", "you're too dumb" "why didn't you hear me before?"......
I cover my "tracks" as best I can, like... "Oh yea, I remember that trip"... when I really don't....

anyway-- I don't have an answer to your question... as I guess.... I don't or am not able to deal in the way most others do here.
I have tons of questions myself... I'm too fearful to post any of them though. I can tend to be quite a "target" for aggression.

anyway-- thanks for posting and for being here.

I look forward to your inquiries.

regards
fins