Don't give up or give in to the feelings as much as possible. You are a good person and don't deserve to be treated the way you were. It's not worth going to the hospital over someone else's bad judgment or outright cruelty. If you need to go, of course, that's always an option, but I hope you can get through this by talking to your T again tomorrow. I get paranoid too sometimes and feel like I'm being watched. Try to let the thoughts pass through without holding onto them. What I do is say, "These are only thoughts. They're not reality. I don't have to act on them." I have to do this a lot as I have invasive images of self harm. But it can work with thinking you're being watched too. If none of this is helpful, feel free to ignore it. But I'm thinking about and pulling for you.