the host being responsible for the actions of the alter is just naturally what happens. example when I was 5 yrs old I was sitting at the table and my mom yelling at me because I had gotten into the candy Jar right before dinner. no amount of saying "but I didnt do it" was going to end that lecture about ruining my dinner. I just knew might as well sit here and get the talking to over with. and did. same thing any other time one of my alters did something and someone caught the misbehavior. Taking responsibility for what the alters do is just part of the deal with having alters. from my first split into an alter until I was integrated someone was coming to me saying, I did this or I said that or hey why you walking away from me I thought I was your friend. and my standing taking responsibility by either listening or if they needed a reason I came up with a reason.

eventually since I am integrated I did gain control. I did so through years of therapy and years of medications for things like anxiety, depression that sometimes affected my being triggered and switching to get away from the triggers.