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When you had your first breakdown, Ozzie, it sounds like you didn't know it was coming until it hit you, subsequently we have some sense what's going on inside us, if we are lucky enough to be able to read our own illness. You were very wise to take action recently to protect yourself.

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You are very right about my first breakdown. I didn't have a clue what was happening. After the first time, I think we do have more of a sense that things are beginning to head in that direction again. (even if we deny it to our good friend who noticed).
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I lost contact with every friend and acquaintance I had, and in my later recovery I moved with my wife to a different town, and now I don't see the old crowd at all. I don't want their judgements, or their embarrassment.


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> After my first breakdown I wanted to move too. It wasn't possible because of my husband's work and my four kids in school. I stayed home a lot and still do. I wouldn't venture over to the shopping center where I worked at an insurance company. btw, the insurance company fired me as a result of my being hospitalized. </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
When you started to post here again, I was so relieved, as it indicates that you have not fallen compeletely flat. The important thing now is to put any irrelevant thoughts aside and allow yourself to go through whatever is happening and into recovery again.


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> I'm trying very hard to work through to a complete recovery. I hope coming back here and posting is helping me but I haven't decided that yet. I think I asked you to reply to this thread because I still need to talk about things. I don't need to talk about the irrelevant anymore but I do need to talk about what has been going on inside of me.

Thank you for saying I am brave.....I haven't decided if it was brave or stupid to return.

((((((((((Myzen)))))))))))))) Thank you for your reply and for your friendship.