((((Morgana, geez, (JD),PleaseHelp,shezbut,gelfling))))

Thank you all for responding and I hope you all can find peace with those emotions also. Today is so overwhelming with emotions and memories that I feel I am being pulled apart within, an internal battle so to speak. Nothing makes sense and I feel so confused.

There seems to be nowhere to really attach these emotions too even though they go to the memories it seems I am being flooded too much to understand or even get any grip on anything at the moment. Tears have fell all day and an emptiness is filling me as I have push everyone away and shut down.

These emotions scare me and even though I know in my head that they cannot hurt me physically they are tearing me apart emotionally. I feel I have got a brick tied around my neck pulling me under. And I feel scared. But still I know I have to somehow feel these to get through them. All I want is to somehow find myself again for I feel so lost inside or somewhere.

Sometimes there is a feeling that it will never end and that the memories will never end. Fear is gripping and I shake even above the tears. Pain seems really close, closer than I want to admit. I feel exhausted and I have not done anything all day, but feel and remember.

Thank you all for your care and encouragement. I am trying to breath and journal. Seems I write for hours, sometimes nothing comes at other times I have pages. I appreciate you all very much. Hugs.

dps