This week started out pretty rough. I saw a few of the people I was in the show with at school on monday which kind of sent my emotions haywire. I accidentally hit my face with my car door on the way home from school (like an imbecile) and spent the rest of the following two days hitting that same spot over and over again on purpose with anything, a fist or a hairbrush or anything, making it hurt more. I'm starting to think I've got a pain addiction.
Wednesday was a really good turning point though. I stumbled upon someone from the show that I got pretty close to over the summer, and we sat in the sunshine and had a really good conversation. He made me feel really good without even knowing that I was feeling badly, and the fact that I was able to talk pretty openly with him (he's kind of been a source of intimidation since I met him three years ago) made me proud of myself and happy that I was able to keep my cool and carry on a good conversation. Kind of silly, but maybe a year ago I never would have approached him to talk and be friendly with because I didn't think I was worth his time. Baby steps, I guess.
But now it's Friday morning and I haven't felt the urge to hit my face (or cut, for that matter) since Wednesday. I did, however, get my third tattoo yesterday. I don't really know if that counts as SI... I didn't go in for the pain, and it wasn't done on a whim, I've been wanting to get this tattoo for a couple of years at this point. It's kind of just a coping mechanism, I guess.
That's all for now. I'm headed home to see my parents for the long weekend, so hopefully that'll be more relaxing than stress-inducing. Thanks for reading.