You say "love" twelve times (I may have missed one or two) in your post, but not once is it about the most important person - YOU. IMHO, if you truly want any relationship (friend or lover) to work, you have to love (or at least like) yourself first. I didn't know or even like myself until I was 25, and it led me to make more than a few romantic mistakes with "the loves of my life". Then I took a step back, spent a year with just "me", and learned all about who I chose to be in my life and why I chose them to be there. Fifteen years later, all of my relationships are healthy (even the disfunctional ones with my family!), but I know I would be alright without them. I love and like myself, and because of that I have surrounded myself with great people who love me (with all my "warts") too! Cliche as it is, real love begins inside you. Good luck.