LMO - Before I went to court, "my breaking point", I wanted to just get a fun job and hang out. I am so far past that now I don't know what to do.

My family, friends, and professors saw the warning signs after the first criminal incident against me (May 2004) but I refused to stop. I ignored everyone and I think I was running on adrenaline. The police told me not to return to school for 6 months to prevent me from becoming like this (while it was happening).

I'm not that smart or I could have stopped this. I went from turning out flawless papers to this. I am ashamed of myself. That is the biggest problem.

I guess getting a "fun job" would be the next step. I want to go back but I can barely get interested in my work. Right now I am focusing on being able to get out of bed. I can't see past today.