Thanks for the input. My sister took guardianship of my son while I was bouncing in and out of psych hospitals; I went into post partum depression when I lost my last chance to have another baby ( fertility treatments had drained our resources). My insurance company threatened to stop my therapy if I didn't try medication. The medication pushed me over the edge into post-partum psychosis; from that point on it was never do I NEED medication it was which medication MIGHT work; Recovery happened once I put my foot down and stopped everything, now I am on an anti- seizure medication which has normalized my sleep.

My GYN says that had I been treated with BIRTH CONTROL pills in slowly lowering doses I would have recovered much quicker- 3 years of fertility treatments had messed up my hormones- NOT my brain chemicals!

I am pro-se fighting this because we can't afford an attorney- I am on disability; Although my treatment providers feel that there is no need for my son to be away, the GAL sided with my sister 100%- and noted the time he has been with her as part of the issue- the GAL was supposed to take 60 days to write her report- 16 MONTHS later she finally filed it- and we are to blame???

Even the day after getting the report I saw my therapist- she said she didn't agree, but how I handled this would weigh heavily on what happens next. I took a long walk after I read the letter, sent out an e-mail with the news to all my friends who have been praying for me, took a shower, my regular medication ( pain meds, muscle relaxer and seizure medication) and ONE klonopin- I have 2 prescribed PRN per day. Next day, did some banking, filed some stiff with the federal court ( not related to this); then went to my appointment. All stuff done rationally, as calmly as possible;

While there is no grounds to terminate our parental rights, the GAL says ending the guardianship would cause psych harm to my son because he has been with my sister so long- and she has been filling him with lies and making seeing him VERY difficult- even with court ordered visits!

The GAL focused on 2 yrs of "meltdown"- ignored 16 years from college to then with no issues at all- dealt with my PTSD without medication, held a job, lead a full life. I am one of the 2% of people that the FDA puts that black box warning on the medication about- but I am not a "young adult" ( 44 now)- the only reason they said young adult was because all the studies excluded adults between 25 and 65! Our chemical make up doesn't majically change at 25- why limit the studies??

I am to the best of my ability trying to mount my defense- but I have a hearing in two weeks regarding visits and need three plans ( one- no supervision; two- supervision by a friend of ours; three- visitation by a neutral 3rd party[which of course we have to pay for]); then within a week I have to have my full defense ready with ANY and all witnesses, articles that I want to present and any other information I many want to present at the hearing. which will be two weeks after that!

Even if I manage to get a legal aid lawyer, they aren't going to have much time to prepare- and I certainly don't want an extention- that is what keeps happening and making it harder to get him back.

I will keep you up to date- but if anyone knows of good articles that show that SSRIs can cause worse reations- especially when post- partum please let me know!