Cin - man, what you are writing is scary. I'm taking you seriously. Not sure where in California you live, but I used to live in SF and would be glad to help you find somebody to help you. Oh... and I just read that you are a psych. nurse, so I guess you already know what resources you have available. Oh. And at a prison -- I can see how you'd be stressed. Can you take a medical leave of absence or at least some vacation and get out of your head for a bit? Or take a few yoga classes or get some massages? Massage schools abound in California, and you can get a massage from a student for about $20/hour or something like that.

Please don't hesitate to call 911 if you are feeling like you need intervention from yourself. But if you need someone to talk to, someone here referred me to a really good website that offers online therapy. You can read the profiles and certifications of the therapists (some psychologists, lots of MAs in social work) and you can find someone who is online and available for immediate counseling for 1/2 hour or 1 hour sessions. If you are interested in this, the website is www.helphorizons.com. I have used it twice so far and it has been a big help for me.

Take care -- I'm thinking about you,
LMo

We are ALL going to be a-ok!