When does all the pain, hurt, sadness, feeling like I can't breath, heartache, and crushing of your world stop? just forget it. I don't even know why I try and post here.

I guess I decided I should post more???? IDRK. I'm just so confused. Right now I can't think of anymore words to describe it. I have hit such a depressed state since my T and I decided it is time we stopped our therapy work together. This brings up hugh abandonment issues for me, and as some of you know, just recently I had to say goodbye to my parents (still living, but still abusing me so I had to cut them out of my life).

I'm so lost on what to feel. All I know is I want the feelings to go away. I'm so tired and exhausted. I was hoping it wouldn't be so hard to move on from all this. I was hoping I wouldn't feel such a loss of leaving my T. I need him to go on. It feels that way any ways.

I even thought of calling my T last night just to hear his voice, my heart feelings like it is breaking more and more the closer we get to the end. The end will be soon. We are thinking by the end of this month. I don't want to feel this sadness that long.