I am posting this message in memory of my dear friend Lonnie, I don't know which was harder, identifying his corpse at the morgue or telling his mom. He will always be with me and I will always love him but at the same time, if I could dig him up and slap him silly for all the horrendous pain he has put his mother and I through. If only my last memory of him wasnt on a steel table... cold, pale, blue... if only he had asked for help... and if that didnt work... ask again... and again... and again. If you cant love yourself enough to keep going, pick one random person in your life and decide that day that you will suffer through just for them. Let us love you long enough til you can love yourself.