((((((((((WePow))))))))))))

The therapy relationship can be so, so, so, so difficult. It's completely unlike any other relationship, and it's just so freaking intimate and intense and, sometimes, confusing.

For me, I've noticed that as I move into different stages of healing, it's like I have to come to terms with the relationship all over again. And the dissociation adds another layer of complexity to the whole thing as well. My last few sessions have been really difficult....it's like I'm relearning the relationship.

It's hard that T is there, but not there. My T disappears over the weekend - or it feels like it. If I need him, he will usually e-mail me Sunday night, but Friday afternoon, Friday night, all day Saturday and all day Sunday, he's just *gone*. When we are together, he is absolutely, 100% "present", and at the same time, he's the guy who's just NOT THERE at other times.

I do know he loves me and cares for me and about me. AND I know that I'm so grateful he's my T. AND I know that I kind of hate the therapy relationship sometimes. They're all true. So freaking messy.

((((((((((WePow)))))))))))) Wishing you peace