What do you think about the connection between feeling that you are valuable and that you deserve good things and being able to maintain a weight where you look good?

I have always been maybe 20 pounds overweight. If I ever lose around five pounds for whatever reason I automatically gain it back because for some reason I don't feel physically comfortable at the lower weight. I never thought about it too much until this past weekend.

We were out on a 4 day weekend trip where I noticed some very beautiful young women. One was perfect in every way. It got me thinking, why are some so lucky? I then got thinking about how maybe they were really valued while growing up so they just developed really beautifully (I do realize the genetic limitations of this but I do feel that you can be more beautiful if you feel beautiful). (I'm also sure that there are perfect looking woman out there that weren't valued like they deserved to be valued).

Rewind a bit and over the last few months we have been taking a lot of pictures because we have been traveling. I noticed in these pictures how I look/feel about myself. Over the course of these 2 months I worked on feeling better about my physical self and it showed in the pictures and I feel that I looked better because I felt better about myself.

Okay, let's pull this all together. So I feel that I keep my weight up because I don't feel that I deserve to look good. I have a big nose and dry frizzy hair. I need to stop feeling that I am ugly (I'm not beautiful but I am not ugly either). I really feel that I can look better if I REALLY BELIEVE that I deserve to look good. Let's see if this belief change can get me to weigh less. I am very capable of eating correctly, I just need to believe that I deserve to look good......

My husband deserves to have me at a lower weight too. He takes really good care of himself. He would prefer me at a lower weight (he is nice about it though).

Comments?