Quoting purple fins:
"I've never had a weight problem.... not because I have an eating disorder, not because I have too much self-love(narcissism)... but because I worry incessantly over what others think of me and if I will be judged/or of worth. I so want to be accepted but it never seems to be enough-- what ever I give. (favors, ever listening and rarely talking, staying thin to be pleasing to the eye like people say movie stars and models are)"

Fins, I really hope one day you allow yourself to celebrate the fact that you don't have a weight problem, rather than feel apologetic about it. You have the right to have a nice, good body without having to feel embarrassed and to justify. If you could just rescue your body from this whole cobweb of "what others think of me" stuff... hmm, wouldn't that be great? Would you enjoy your body more? As what you have never seems to be enough, it makes me wonder whose expectations you have internalised?