Hello heymoe (any relation to heyjoe? there is a new member of that name, just seems like an unusual coincidence)

You really have had a lot to contend with over the last 2 years. I hope we can support you in a way that helps you.

I really am sorry that you lost your brother; trasnplant patients can get too sick to receive the transplants they need and they really are on borrowed time. I'm sorry your brother was unable to last the distance; once in a coma it is too late to reverse the damage to other organs and systems which depend on healthy liver and kidneys to function.

As far as your husband is concerned I would if it were me, offer him the front door and he would feel the heel of my boot as he walked out of it. The nerve to look for other women online is awful especially one that he has had a previous relationship with. And knowing that she was probably one of the causes of his previous marriage ending.

As for him telling two women that you are crazy that is a worse betrayal than going to see one of them. I don't blame you for being angry at all. His betrayal seems to be something that he is trying to cover by having you painted as a mad woman; it seems as if he is trying to make himself appear innocent.

Is he considering you crazy because of your jealousy? I think he should maybe consider his behaviour and the obvious concern of you knowing what he is up to by changing his passwords, as being responsible for some of your feelings.

I really hope you can sort this out as it is very obviously ripping your ribs as it probbly would mine. I demand open honesty in a relationship and if my partner were finding women online to talk to I would invite him to go and live with one of them, because he wouldn't be living with me any more; I love him dearly but I respect myself just as much if not more. I spent too long in a marriage to a man who had one affair after the other, one while I was in hospital for 4 months being pieced back together after surgery which went very wrong.

I know I shouldn't bring my stuff into this and that is not supportive for you, but my exhusband too told his mistresses of my "insanity" and my mental illness gave him the leverage he needed to be seen as such a wonderful man for standing by me.

Please I urge you to care about yourself. You don't have to leave your husband to get a resolution here, but you don't have to put up with his actions either. When it comes down to it though, you are the only one able to make a decision, good luck,

Rhiannon