In a short period of time I have lost my Mother and best friend to cancer, I was there for both of them and the memories of their death haunt me, to the point I am out of control. I can no longer function in social settings, and all I want to do is isolate my self because my emoitions are a roller coaster. To hear others talk about thier family and to hear them say I love you, sends me over the edge. Now with the news of my Father with brain cancer it is only a matter of days. Once again the roller coaster is going full speed ahead. I do see a therapist and we are dealing with the losses. But is never seems to fail when you put one foot foward you take 2 steps back, a never ending story. Now just to hear the phone ring again to hear your Father is gone, is so unbearable that I struggle to get thru the day. Soon, I will no longer have any family alive. I have no children and no significant other. With the Holidays approaching and knowing what is to come, I struggling with loneliness and fear. I do see a therapist weekly and it is a great confort just for that 1 hour a week.

I have read some of the posting and I am sorry for everyone's losses. That emptiness, that void in our hearts hurts like nothing else, even if we know that our loves one's are in a better place.

The pain is like a scab from a wound, it heals but the scar is still there.

For those that have lost not just from death, but from any thing else in thier lives, my thoughts are with you.

My pain is like a RIVER it never stops flowing.