I wish I could stop myself crying. The tears just flow. I feel so sad all the time and even while I am crying inside my head I am thinking you are being silly stop it you have nothing to cry for. Sometimes it makes me feel better for a little while other times as I am crying I end up laughting at myself for being so stupid usually this happens when I am trying to explain to someone how awful I am feeling and worrying about stuff I can do nothing about. I don't know how to hold back the tears. I am laying here writing this now and the tears are rolling down my cheeks as I feel so tired, sad and worn out. I have to make a phone call to a friend I had not spoken to since last year. She called me as she was distressed and needed someone to speak to. I listened but had to cut her short as I had to get back to work. I listen to her when she calles me but I find it draining as what ever she tells me I don't repeat it to anyone but when she asks me about myself I never tell her anything as she goes back and tells other people but her version of what I confided in her. So although I listen to her I never let her know anything about me and how awful I am feeling. We have not been close for years but she off loads on me.