
Do you think you might have "SAD" (seasonal affective disorder}? Generally that grabs you during the less-light months (such as not summer) and one help for it is a white light lamp specially made for giving you the light your body needs to make the chemicals that help keep you feeling well.
You know, sticking around is good. It's never too late to say you goof and are trying to be better. It also gives them an example to follow, to keep trying and not to quit.

Ask them to share more with you, too, about what they need for support.
Be well.