i was at work today and a coworker came up asked if she could tell me something. i said yes. she said i dont think your depression is under control. i was trying to stay well and even keeled. she is right though. I've been sinking. The mood stabilizer isnt keeping me as even as I had hoped. I didnt want to have to go back on anti depressants. i never have good luck with them and i know the depression will end. It always does. thats the nature of the beast. i asked my coworker if it was that obvious. she said to her it is as she is bipolar as well, maybe not to others but shes been there. having her say something actually was a good thing. i knew deep down i havent been doing well. just didnt want to admit it. cuz if i did i have to deal with it.