yes starlite, I agree. People who tell anyone to smile, do not realize how difficult it is for them to put on that smiling mask. Someone several years ago at the post office told me to smile. So I started training myself to put on the mask when I am out. But sometimes I just decide I do not want to. Like today. Lately I have been wearing sunglasses when I am out in public so people will not see my sad eyes. But, how loneley it is to hide the true feelings. And how sad it is that people are expected to be happy and cheery.

I always said that my mother really wanted a bottle of champagne as a daughter. She wanted me to be bubbly and effervescent. Actually as soon as I turned 16 she had my nose fixed because she heard it changed the kid's personality to have their nose fixed. Problem is that my nose bothered only her. And her personality did not change when she had my nose fixed, lol. Oh yes, a week before I had it fixed, I went to visit a friend in the hospital who had just had hers fixed. I met her mom for the first time. She noticed my nose and asked me if I had it fixed because it was so nice. There wasnt anything wrong with it. My mother just wanted me to be outgoing and happy and bubbly. Boy was she barking up the wrong... nostril. My personality did not change post surgery. I still was insecure and in pain. So yes, I sure do know about that smile thing.