It's amazing how isolated we can make ourselves and just start feeding into the idea of total self-blame. When you add the five different voices in your head reminding you of a kazillion things that happened a kazillion years ago (that were, of course, ALL your FAULT!!), plus whatever it is about BP that makes it so hard to forgive and forget, and you have a recipe for disaster.

Thing is, I know I've made some bad choices, still do, but deep down there is a caring, kind, giving person that deserves to forgive herself. I just have to keep digging. I hope everyone here keeps digging, too.