It's okay to vent. Everyone deserves to have someone there for support. Someone that treats you, "Normally." Anyone can understand how overwhelming your situation feels if even doctors haven't helped. However, you mentioned something that worries me, your marriage. One thing I've learned early on is that being forced to stay in a negative relationship because it feels like you have no other choice is often unhealthy or even abusive. I sincerely hope that isn't the case here and that whatever you two decide on that you'll be given a fresh new start. Please hang in there.