I don't know, it sounds like you are holding yourself at arms length too? What do you want?

I would find something symbolically solitary, books, for me, and ask others for them, maybe tell each person a single activity you would like to do with just that person? You know how one can have a progressive dinner where the dinner party changes location for each course? http://www.ehow.com/how_4557940_thro...ve-dinner.html I would do something different and I'd be the only one changing and I'd do it over the week or month so I wouldn't get overwhelmed by timing or people.