Welcome to PC, mysecretname! Everyone is really kind, caring, and supportive, so feel free to come here to ask any question, vent, rant, or share successes!

First of all, I want to say how impressed and how courageous it is of you to deal with your girlfriend's bipolar head on. I really appreciate that you want to learn as much as you can and be the best partner you can. It's really touching.

Now, on to your questions. I have never been diagnosed as full blown bipolar, though I've had a few doctors tell me I"m on the "spectrum" for Bipolar II rapid cycling. But I do have anxiety and depression (and I"m sure there's something else going on too, just haven't figured out what...) and it definitely puts my boyfriend through the wringer at times.

I think the absolute most important thing for me is communication. I like to be told that I am loved and that he's not going to leave me. In addition to just plain talking about what is going on in her head, being there to comfort her if she needs it, I also appreciate little things that show he was thinking about me when I wasn't around. I think this is something most people like in a relationship, but I feel for me it kind of solidifies the whole "I love you, I'm not leaving" business. Like, when we're apart, he's still thinking about me and not thinking "omg, she's so crazy, how can I get away from her?!" I lump this in with communication because to me you're communicating your love to your girlfriend. But definitely talking. I like to try to be completely open and honest with my boyfriend (though, not brutally so), and he is with me.

Now, I'm not my boyfriend, and I haven't asked him this question, (and honestly, if I did, his first response would be "I don't know"), but I"m going to try to answer how I think he would answer. I think what he would think his most important quality for dealing with my issues would be patience. He is extremely patient with me. If I'm freaking out in the middle of the night, he doesn't get angry, he simply holds me and tries to let me ride out my fit. He doesn't always understand whats happening, but he always tries to sit with me, keep me company, calm me down, basically take care of me when I need it. I am forever grateful for this (although I'm not always the best at showing it)

The other thing that I believe he really values is not letting himself get completely absorbed by my illness. He still has a life of his own and his own time that he can do things just for him. I personally try to help this by doing things for him that I know he'll appreciate (even something little like filling his water bottle for him when I know he wants to play soccer in the afternoon). If he is not healthy and happy with himself without me around, there's no way he'd be able to handle dealing with me all the time without being completely drained (and eventually burned out and unable to deal with me at all ever).

I hope this helped some. I probably got really confusing, and I apologize. I also apologize for talking so much (it's a bad habit of mine; short and sweet really isn't in my capabilities!).

Again, welcome to PC!