Hi. I know that I don't post in this forum very often. I'm not DID but I have other dissociative symptoms. The main thing right now is that there is a big split in me. One part of me is competent and professional and won't let people see signs of weakness. The other part is all the emotions and feelings, and that part is weak and scared. I'm aware of the parts, although when either part is in charge, the other part seems like it really isn't me. From the perspective of the feeling part, I can't imagine being able to do the things that I manage as the competent part, so it seems unreal and fake. It's just an empty shell. From the competent side, the feeling stuff just seems so out of control and embarassing and I just want to stomp on it and get rid of it, and I hate it when it gets to the point where I can't keep it hidden anymore. T wants me to synthesize these two parts, and learn to work together. The last thing they want is to work together. They have no use for each other at all. They hate each other. How am I supposed to put them together?

Rap