Quote:
Originally Posted by lynn P.
I feel perplexed a little. I understand that porn is available with click of a mouse - it's not like the old days where you had to go to a dingy corner store and secretly buy it. I don't approve of porn but I'm realistic and understand that some people can handle it in 'moderation' and I put this is quote. I also fully support a mans or woman's right to masturbate - what ever happened to good old imagination. 
If you read CG's post, you'll see that she's newly married - her husband isn't being very kind and he already insulting her and scolding her, when she doesn't want to have sex -even though it's twice a day. There's also a very IMPORTANT point she made and that's - her husband admits "he's been battling this ADDICTION for years". This isn't a simple case of a hubby getting his occasional jollies from porn, where she can just look the other way. He admits he has a problem. I think he may even be addicted to sex. I doubt the average Jane really wants to have sex twice a day for years on end. What's going to happen when she gets tired of doing it twice a day - he gets mad at her - is this normal? I don't get how some are saying - it's okay he's just a normal guy - your marriage is fine.  |
I think the problem here is that there were multiple posts in different areas and not everyone has the whole story... You have brought in information that was not in this current thread, so thank you for that so that everyone can get the "big picture".
I agree that this is a big issue. Not because he is simply looking at porn or that he is masturbating, personally I don't think that there is anything wrong with either one of those things. One thing that women don't understand is that for men, the urge to masturbate and the urge to have sex are very different and completely separate. I have been in relationships where I had sex more than twice a day and still needed to masturbate and I have had times with the complete opposite with very little sex and very little masturbation. I guess I have rambled a bit, but the point is that they are separate urges and I honestly think that no matter how satisfied, beautiful, sexy, desirable, and downright perfect my partner is that occasionally the urge to masturbate will still arise, even multiple times a week or day. Do not take this as you will never be good enough, it is in the way men are wired and should in no way reflect on you as a woman. But all of this would only matter if this was a "normal" bout of porn and masturbating, which this is not.
This is a serious problem that him and you both should seek counseling for. I agree with the points made above. Getting angry at looking at a picture of your partner definitely points to a much deeper issue and he has admitted (which is good) that he has been battling this for years. Even without that he has been aggressive, verbally abusive, threatening and they are still newlyweds. Any of these by themselves would require some serious work to resolve with or without a counselor. All of these issues combined means you definitely need to seek help.
As for you, I am sure even without ever seeing you that your body is not the issue. I know exactly what size you are, as you are the same size as my girlfriend. She is also a size 0 and can wear (and does sometimes) childrens clothing and is usually around 90lbs or so. I don't know how tall you are, but she is 4'11" so she is at least proportionate although her friends and I have to make sure she doesn't drop any weight, if it was up to her she would. It is important to not watch the numbers or the sizes but to just be healthy. Being healthy in mind and body is the most important.
Oh and she does the same with her size/weight, she says it is one thing she can control and she sure as heck make sure she does....
Hope that helps and sorry to write a book on you...