Hello, madisgram. My thought is to call your son and ask to meet with him. If he agrees, ask him why you are being ostracized. Let him know how his wife has been treating you all this years, how hurt you are and how disappointed you are he ignores you. If he will not meet with, perhaps you can say what needs to be said in an email.

If your son will not talk about this problem, you have a decision to make. Your daughter in law has a problem. Your son does too. Eventually, it may be good to see if all three of your can meet to resolve what is gong on. If your son will not take some initiative to make peace, you realistically will not be able to it on your own.

Be well.