Why do I feel like this? Why?
Why am I not able to "get over it?" Why?
Why do I bother with it? Why?
Why should I try? Why?
Why do I think I'm no good? Why?

These are the questions that run through my head almost constantly. I want them to stop. To go away and never come back. I am tired of trying to be a "normal" person, when my life is such a mess. I am tired of people asking how I am, they don't really care. I tell them I'm ok or that I am good, when in reality I am wanting to die. Of course if I really say that I want to die, they will want to put me back in the hospital. I don't want to go there again. I wish I could wake up in the morning and not be depressed, that I would have the energy to take care of my daughter. What kind of life am I giving her? I wonder if she would be better off with her father, but she is what keeps me going. I just wish I was a better mom and person, not someone who wears a mask to hide their true self. I AM TIRED OF LIVING THIS LIFE!