Hi Wantabenormal,

Not sure if this is in the same area - but one thing that has always bothered me about myself is that I change depending on who I am with. (Although with therapy I think *I hope*I have been changing this quite a bit). But in the past it was always: If I'm with someone who is quite and reserved, then I get quiet, if I'm with someone who is more outgoing then I get as loud as I possibly can be (which isn't much for me ). I even sometimes copy their mannerisms.
Even my handwriting changed all the time. I often thought that I knew I would be "my own person" when my handwriting stayed the same all the time.
I just want to be me. Not be so influenced by those around me. In the past I just did not know how to behave around people in order to be accepted. God forbid I would just be myself. I didn't even know what that was. And to be honest, I now think a lot of these issues are due to being a child of divorce and a child of 2 alcoholics... So to be sure, I am still working on this. But I have found therapy very helpful. I think changing this has something to do with putting up boundaries and realizing that it is OK to be yourself around other people.
But in terms of getting down deep inside yourself, I agree it may be helpful to make a list of anything you think might interest you:
What interests you when you are on your own? Do you have any pets? Any types of TV shows you like to watch? Did you ever have a favorite subject in school? Do you have a certain book or book category that's your favorite? I have really stuggled with feeling like I "don't know what interests me." Therapy has been helpful to expose this feeling more as, "I'm not allowed to have anything for myself" and to look at why deep down I feel this way.
One good one way (I think) too see what might be your hidden likes is to imagine a big magazine rack like the one they have in those huge mega-bookstores. If you were standing right in front of it. Which areas would you be drawn to? Say you got to pick 3 or 4 magazines to take home for free. Which ones would you choose?
Sending good thoughts your way...

E