I've been skipping school since I was in 6th grade. I'm in 10th now and for as long as I've skipped I've been suffering from depression. My Dad only accepted this last week, regardless of my poor attendance. My skipping has gotten so bad that for 8th and 9th grade I stopped going all together and either had to be home schooled or put into an alternative program to keep me from failing..

As I type this, I'm skipping today as well.

I would love to be normal and to just go to school and laugh, get into clubs with my friends.. but I'm not normal, and I'm very different and I cannot relate to any kids in my area.. I've lived in this same area for almost 8 years, and I have yet to find any close friends.. so I'm sure I know what I'm talking about when I say I cannot relate. I only have one friend from third grade who goes to a different high school, though I don't really consider him much of a friend, and another friend who I met this year but she lives downtown and we don't speak as often as we used to. All of my good friends live in another country.. yeah I had to go searching in other countries to actually find people who "get" me. -sigh-

I just don't know what to do. I know if I continue to be the way I am I'll get my Dad charged, and everything will break down and get bad.. but even so I can't make myself go. I know that I need to go to school to have a good life.. but I don't really care..

I was good in homeschooling, I was good in my alternative program (it was a small class of 18 students who also had attendance issues for whichever reason. It was simple to make friends and you worked one on one with the teachers and worked at your own pace. I would have gone back but they only allowed you to stay for 1 semester) Regular high school though.. I just can't do. There's too many people, I hate presenting, I hate group work, the teachers are complicated and never really make it easy.. plus the fact that in my alternative program I finished at least a credit a month, and in high school they make you work on the same thing for like 5 months.. yeah that's not really encouraging..

But anyways, how can I over come this?? Can I? I'm in the process of getting a therapist but.. the last time we tried they never phoned us back and even so it's gonna take months.. I can't wait that long..