>>i dunno how you keep so positive,

That is part of my nature, has been my whole life. I'm not the kind of person to get upset if I plan an outdoor event and it rains that day. IMO, I know that rain happens, and if it is so important there should always be a backup plan. Most of the time if it rains I will just go with the flow.

When I am depressed, that humorous nature is something that I try to remember as one of my good traits. All through my life even when the worst of things would happen to me I would always be able to turn it into a humorous anecdote. Sometimes that hinders me because I can't just feel "bad" around friends, but I am able to express that with my T and in support groups so it doesn't end up held in. When friends come I just try to accept the fact that I end up laughing about it and appreciate their company.

The bad times for me are when I can't find that spark, usually I guess because I am so isolated from people, or are so deep in denial that I am not dealing with the problems and relying too much on just feeling better whenever I can. And at its deepest, I am unable to concentrate or enjoy anything so even that doesn't work.