Wow, I wasn't aware of all of this heavy load you are carrying and trying to balance, I am so sorry I replied without realizing ALL your stresses, but PLEASE don't "cut", see if you can get some sort of help or support for that, I apologize if you already are in the process and I didn't know.
Take care, wish I had something better to say.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( PlanningtoExist)))))))))))))))))))

In giving advice seek to help, not please your friend
SOLON